There is a song on Kelsea Ballerini’s The First Time album that has become a fan favorite. But fans have never gotten to hear it live.

And there’s a reason.

“Secondhand Smoke” is a song she wrote about her parents:

Sometimes I would hear ’em screaming,
When they thought that I was sleeping
They’d just fight about whatever,
I don’t know if they ever had a reason

Am I the product of a problem that I couldn’t change?
Got his eyes, got her hair
So do I get their mistakes?

With such personal lyrics she was afraid she’d break down if she tried performing it at her shows. So fans had to enjoy it on the album. Until now.

To celebrate the five year anniversary of The First Time, Kelsea took to Instagram with only a guitar and her vulnerable voice to share part of the song with fans.

 

View this post on Instagram

 

secondhand smoke is the one song I’ve put on an album that I knew I would never perform live because it was something too real for me to get through. I thought a way to celebrate my first album would be to play a bit for you for the first time…five years later. // ps- you don’t have to choke. pss- I love my parents.

A post shared by Kelsea Ballerini (@kelseaballerini) on May 19, 2020 at 8:11pm PDT

The performance clearly touched fans.

One posted “Thank you so much for this. As someone who sees my own parents arguing all the time and never listening to each other, this song is a good reminder to me that some day when I’m married it doesn’t have to be like that.”

Another fan clearly connects with the song, commenting “Oh my god. I have lyrics to this tattooed to me.”